"Wandering Minds" Want To Know

Although often times cliche, I love a good quote. A quote that makes me consider something that I wouldn't have otherwise...or addresses one of life's many circumstances. The quote that has, as of late, been permeating my thoughts is one from the movie "Mona Lisa Smile." It was delivered by the movie's antagonist, Betty Warren, wonderfully played by Kirsten Dunst and is as follows:

"Not all who wander are aimless. Especially those who seek truth beyond tradition, beyond definition, beyond the image."

For today's post, I'd like to consider that first sentence. Not. All. Who. Wander. Are. Aimless. This really hits home for me.

I have always been a wanderer. When I was about 4 years old, I wandered away from my mother during one of our day trips to Coney Island. I won't say that I was "kidnapped" but my cousin did end up finding me with a woman who would not give me back to her. My cousin had to run and get my father and...let's just say Lonnie didn't play that...NOBODY messed with his little girl!

There were more occasions, during my very young years, that I overtly demonstrated my independence - sending my mother into fits of panic. Over time, common sense and street smarts set in and my wandering took on a new form: a wandering mind. But not in the "flighty, airhead sense"...in an "I think a little about a lot of things all of the time" sense. And I'm not just talking about trival things like: what am I going to wear today or what am I going to have for dinner (although when extremely famished, that is NO trival thing). No. I'm talking some pretty major life decisions...namely, my career.

As many of you know, I am in the process of looking for a new gig. Even though I have decided to focus on a career path that I believe is perfect for me...my mind is constantly wandering. Thinking about all of the many other things that interest me...things that come natural to me...and that I happen to do quite well. Most times I like the fact that I have many interests and talents...but sometimes I wish that there was only ONE thing in the world that I did really well or that piqued my curiosity. That way, there would be no confusion as to what I should do with my life...and I would feel like I had a definitive purpose. Or atleast that's what I'm assuming (and we all know what happens when we do that...lol).

For longer than I would like, I have been more concerned with what other people think, what they want for me and what society deems as "acceptable." Disappointingly, I have to admit that for the last 7-8 years, I have followed, much more than I have led. My best friend seems to think otherwise...if she were to tell it, I dance to the beat of my own drum and could not care less about what others think. That's who I was when she first met me 12 years ago...and for about 5 or so years after that. Up until recently? I didn't know whether to move on the 2 & 4 or the 1 & 3!

HOWEVER (and here is where the significance of the quote comes in) I have discovered, after many 12 round bouts with myself, that my recent career "wanderings" have not been aimless at all! They have been very focused...focused on finding the truth...MY truth...what is going to make me happy and bring me peace REGARDLESS of what anyone else thinks, suggests or wants. Am I a wanderer? Yes. Will I always be? Maybe. But one thing I now know for sure...I certainly am NOT aimless!

And you thought movies were just for entertainment purposes...LOL!